So I've been thinking about this alot, with sexsexsexsexsex flying at me from all sorts of directions in real life (I don't care that it flies at me from the internet. It's the internet. I expect this.).
I'm 22 years old, virgin, never even been really kissed. This seems lame. I'm more bugged about the latter than the former. The kiss part being an important forerunner to the second, I feel like I don't have enough data to draw a conclusion from.

Still, I have never thrown away the concept of asexuality as a possibility. Even never-been-kissed teenagers still in puberty seem to be interested in sex itself, to be attracted to other people in a purely physical way. I've only experienced that feeling in any strong way with one person, and even then, when I think back to it, I could never think passed cuddling and maybe kissing. Anything further seemed bizarre. And frankly, it still does.

In all my years so far at college, there hasn't been a single person I've felt a genuine physical attraction to. The idea of me having sex is just... odd and feels wrong and strange and just... I have no interest in doing it right now.

I don't and can't write off sex as an impossibility for me at this point, but at the very least, it's something I will never be able to do with someone who isn't the right person. The idea of having sex with somebody without an emotional connection at all boggles my mind. Considering the fact that I haven't felt any inkling of attraction to anybody in a very long time, that right person is going to be pretty damn hard to find. I am certainly open to the possibility that that person will come along eventually, and it will feel right.

However, the fact that I'm not actively seeking a partner doesn't compute with some people. I was recently told I should "get pounded." Even online that's fucking out of line. And it's not the first time. It doesn't compute with most people that not wanting sex is even an option. I must just be scared of it and be in need of fixing. And maybe I am scared. But that doesn't change the fact that I don't feel a need to actively seek it out. If it happens, it happens, and hopefully it'll go well if it does. I don't see my lack of sex as a problem but other people apparently do.

Like anyone else I do certainly want affection and attention and companionship. But that doesn't have to equal "HEY HOTNESS I WANNA BANG YOU."

I refuse to let this make me feel like I am somehow broken because the rest of the world is sex crazed (by comparison to me, at the very least). It is unsettling to me to be in a society where people insist that "sex is the one thing every human being has in common," making it seem like I am somehow less human because of the fact that I'm not lusting after the cock (or vag, whatever).

To the rest of the world: Please do continue having sex as you please. Just don't look down on me for not doing it, because I wouldn't look down on you for doing it. Get out of my bedroom and stop telling me how to live my life because I would never do the same to you.

I need to learn to accept myself for who I am, figure out what I want to be, and hopefully if all goes well, find a way to live my life the way I want to. Stop thinking you have me all figured out, that I'm just lonely or jealous or sexually frustrated, because I honestly am not. I'm sorry I don't fit in one of your little boxes, but you're going to have to deal with it, because I'm not changing any time soon.